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Just a few years after the Bieber turned 18 and began tearing a hellish path through Hollywood, a paparazzo with a very long-range lens gifted the world with grainy pictures of the dick’s dick, and the rest is history.
Justin Bieber Dick Leaked Pics: Jerry Gets His Day In the Sun
2015 was a particularly prodigious year for distributing nude pictures of celebrities without their consent. Hundreds of famous women were violated a few months before the Justin Bieber dick leaked pics & photo scandal when their private photos were stolen and published by hackers. Needless to say, the headlines weren’t complimentary and the women weren’t pleased. When Lenny Kravitz had a wardrobe malfunction that left his dick dangling out of his pants during a concert, his headlines were a heaping pile of compliments with a side of sexist double standards – but he took the same stance as the women, warning that posting or looking at the photos was a violation of his rights.
Don’t worry, though. You’re allowed to look at Justin Bieber dick leaked pics because he wants you to look. And it makes sense. The kid spent most of the year with his shirt off and his pants sagging to pointlessness, and he even became the face of Calvin Klein underwear with some pretty risqué spreads. In retrospect, no one should have been surprised that the natural next step was to defrock completely. And though the pictures were taken without his knowledge, he has embraced the scandal.
In fact, Justin’s only regret is that they weren’t taken just a few minutes later after the warm water took effect. You see, a photographer caught him on vacation in Bora Bora with model Jayde Pierce, and he had just walked out of their villa and onto the hot tub deck when the dick pics were snapped.
That didn’t stop tween girls and grown men alike from ogling his body, though. They even came up with a name for it: Jerry, which a beaming Justin repeated on a radio show just a few weeks later.
No Photoshop for Justin Bieber’s Dick Leaked Photos
Speaking of Calvin Klein… another reason Justin is cool with the attention: (yet slightly annoyed by the effects of AC)? he can finally put those PhotoShop rumors to rest. You see, when Justin’s CK underwear ads were first published, the comparisons to Marky Mark weren’t exactly flattering. Unlike the original CK underwear boy, Justin’s big bulge didn’t seem to belong on his small body, and people called bullshit.
There weren’t just PhotoShop rumors, though; there was an actual pair of pictures circulated to support it. Ironically, the “unedited” photo was actually the edited one, staged to look as though the real Justin Bieber dick leaked pics and photos – and ab muscles, arms, and even neck – was much smaller. When the vacation photos came out, foul play was apparent, because the pixelated dick leaked photos was clearly the result of an untouched photo, taken without any help from special lighting.
Even His Dad Appreciates Bieber’s Leaked Pics
“Proud dad” may sound like a sweet, supportive hashtag, but it’s no surprise that the man who made Bieber possible would manage to sully it. Jeremy Bieber first made headlines in 2014, when father and son indulged in a little good old-fashioned sexual harassment of a flight attendant. A year later, Jeremy was back on our radar with a tweet about his son’s leaked pics. That’s right; when his 21-year-old son’s vacation was interrupted by a photographer with a camera, Dad’s first response was to make a joke about its size.
So, what was the joke? Don’t throw up, but he actually asked Bieber what he fed “that thing”. He was stupid enough to try and play it off as a compliment about a pet; he then posted a picture of a dog he called a “beaut”. But everyone knows Justin Bieber only buys and refuses to properly take care of exotic species; his pet monkey is still being held in customs after he illegally smuggled it into Asia.
Of course, Justin took it in stride. During the same radio interview in which he boasted about Jerry’s popularity with fans, the pop star also defended his dad’s joke as “hilarious”. Apparently he has a very different concept of the typical father-son relationship because he called the tweet “such a dad thing to say” and expressed surprise that anyone would “hate on” his old man for passing along a compliment.
Macklemore Prefers Justin Bieber Dick with Maple Syrup on Top
After years of immature antics and unbearably catchy songs, many Americans continue to rest easy in the knowledge that Justin Bieber isn’t actually one of us. If he commits a crime that’s more serious than peeing in a janitor’s bucket or egging a neighbor’s house (both of which he definitely did), he could even be banished from the States for good. But now that his dick’s out for everyone to see, we hope that doesn’t happen anytime soon. And even if it does, we know right where to go get another glimpse of it: Macklemore’s house.
As a Seattle native, Macklemore is practically Canadian himself. But he might just go all the way to citizenship with the most recent addition to his art collection: a painting of the country’s two most delicious national treasures. That’s right, maple syrup and Justin Bieber’s dick leaked photos are the stars of an oil painting in Macklemore’s home recording studio.
Dan Lacey is the artist responsible for immortalizing this magical union, which Macklemore picked up on Etsy and hung next to a velvet bald eagle. The penis isn’t actually visible in the piece; the maple syrup that drips down Justin’s chest is heading toward a pancake balanced precariously beneath a tuft of pubic hair. The implication is clear. Under the breakfast food is another delicious treat: Justin Bieber’s boner in all its warmed, unedited glory.
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